Assumed, Actual, and Average Performance: Preparing for the horrors of Step 2 using the defense mechanism of Intellectualization

In exactly one week (7 days -- 168 hours -- 10,080 minutes -- you get the idea) I will be sitting in a prometric testing center taking, depending on whom you talk to, the most important test I have ever taken capable of determining all of my future career successes, or just something I need to pass to graduate: The United States Medical Licensing Examination (USMLE) Step 2 Clinical Knowledge.

Tensions are running high, but I am actually quite proud of myself. I began studying weeks, no... months ago, and I find that even though I only have a week left, I am doing a lot less cramming than I had to do for Step 1. And I actually might finish reading an entire review book cover to cover. I may actually do well on this exam.

But do you know what's more important than doing well on exams? Knowing, fairly accurately when you leave the testing center, that you have most likely passed the exam with a 95% confidence interval (did I use that term correctly? I still haven't studied biostatistics). Which is why I have begun analyzing my Usmleworld QBank tests. Upon hitting submit, I quietly contemplate how well I think I may have done, remembering how many questions I "knew" verse how many were "good guesses" verse the inevitable "I have narrowed it down to two, equally likely choices" verse "I have not heard of any of these conditions. I will choose the answer choice that seems most viable." Then I write down my assumed score. Then I write down my actual score and the national average for those 44 questions.

Test Results of QBank tests numbers 93 through 101

What conclusions have I come to? First, my actual performance varies widely. Hopefully over my next tests I can become more consistent, although this isn't likely. I believe this is the nature of any test designed to ask many questions on broad topics.

Second, my predictions are much more conservative than my actual performances. Which is nice to know, although a given: more people feel like they failed an exam than actually did, at least in medical school.

Third, my predictions seem to follow my actual scores fairly closely, although doing really well on test 94 improved my confidence so that on test 95, I assumed I did much better -- even though I in fact did much worse.

And now I have to study for at least six more hours before I can go to sleep. I love summer break.

Seriously though, everything in medicine is really hard to pronounce, which is why there are 1000s of abbreviations.

Compliments of the Charming Cindy Chen

You've got Parrot Fever, Boy! Parrot Fever!

vaccinations! get some

http://www.ct.gov/dph/lib/dph/VPD_US_statistics_2010.pdf
http://www.behance.net/leon_farrant/frame/2878481

We're learning about vaccines in microbiology. It really weirds me out that we have a chickenpox (varicella) vaccine now, because I didn't get one when I was a kid (it was created in 1995, by which time I had already had it). Also amusing: chickenpox affected over four million kids a year? That's crazy. 

some of my friends are talented...

Yes. I have friends. 

I don't know what the general public thinks medical students are like. But some of us are pretty cool. Including my friend Colin, who for some reason really likes turning designs into t-shirts. I don't think I've ever seen any design or artwork from him that wasn't already on a t-shirt when presented to me. 

Quite. Fascinating.

Now we just need to sell these beauts. 

Smiling Segs

I just want that polychromatophilic erythrocyte to know that there is nothing funny about three hours of anemia-centric lecturing.

And that it should stop smiling because it's making everyone else feel bad.


[8:47 am, Sep 24 UPDATE]: That's actually not a polychromatophilic erythrocyte: It's a polymorphonuclear leukocyte, a neutrophil if you will (hehehe, half-rhymes). Regardless, it's a good thing I know that now, because I have an exam in less than five hours. Hurrah.

There's no black or white answer to the question: "Are you studying?"

Clicker Farm

 Some people don't live in North Chicago. But to get extra credit you have to use your clicker in 70% of the classes. Consequently, a lot of clickers end up mysteriously in class, on the desk of someone who doesn't own them.

I hope PETA doesn't get upset about this, because the clickers are treated with the upmost respect.

Just a little biased....

GUESS WHICH GENETIC MUTATION I HAVE!

Time "Well" Spent

Today was a relatively difficult day, with me waking up--unwillingly, seriously, my alarm was set for 9:30 and I woke up two hours earlier--in time for my first class. My first class of six. Of course, most of that miscellaneous time was spent making a pie chart for my blog. What is more depressing? The fact that I spent more time in our lecture hall than I spent sleeping? Or the fact that I spent 52% of my day "studying"?

Well regardless I'm proud of myself. I'm not a type A person, so the fact that an entire seven days before my exam I'm already pounding the books... is either a great sign or a desperate call for help. Did no one see me in the library?! Because I was totally there. Totally studying. Totally not an Elora thing to do.

Watches

Since early last year I've been dying to get a watch. I do not know why I associate professionalism with watches, but let me speculate:

1. Pulling out a phone to check the time is "disrespectful" (your older professors will assume you're getting a quick round of "words-with-friends" in).
2. Being successful but also professional means having functional bling. If I get a doctor's bag, it's going to be the most abstract Vera Bradley pattern I can find. If I have an excuse to have a watch, it will be like a crazy beautiful watch. It won't be like I'm "dressing" up (which would be unprofessional) because I actually need a timepiece (... well I mean technically. I think I can make the argument that I need a time piece).
3. It just feels like a doctorly thing to have. I want to be standing over a patient, taking their blood pressure, their heart and respiration rates, and instead of staring at a wall, I want to be looking somewhat at the patient so I don't seem distant. I also feel like there are a lot of portraits of doctors looking at their watches while assessing a patient's vitals.
4. Also, most obvious: being late is unprofessional. You can lose "professionalism points" from our clinical reasoning course by being late to lab. So yea, punctuality is professional.

Consequently, I've been obsessed with finding a watch. Stylistically, I'm pretty "out there," so the challenge is to try and find something that expresses my personality but doesn't force my personality onto others (or worse, offends people). I also don't want to drop much more than $100, so I went to overstock.com because it's really difficult to find cool watches for women. I guess time is more of like a "dude thing." I don't know and I didn't really care, until, after scrolling through about 500 watches I see this atrocity:

Not only is this thing disgusting, it also asks a very important question: why isn't there a "whimsical women's doctor theme white leather watch"? I do not think I want to put on an air of "whimsicality" when I begin rotations next year, but dammit, I want a doctor's watch made for my womenly wrists!

Well, I have since searched overstock.com for a doctor's watch, and they don't have any. I tried searching for "professional" watches, and of the 40 results I got, 39 of them were men's watches. The one female watch was for "professional divers." Which I guess is cool and stuff because hey! I would've never thought women could descend to the same depths as men due to their whimsical womenly constitution's and other almost-trivial-but-still-obnoxious sexist b***s***. 

Anyway, rant over. If you're curious, I bought the above two watches. The one on the right is transparent, which means I've finally gotten something that's actually my skin tone.... which is another thing I could complain about. But I won't. Since like, I'm in medical school and am like, totally busy and schizz.

Yes, what is immunotherapy?

Seriously though.... #stockphotofail

Whiskey Titers

Histo Quilt

One of the finest thus far! Only 20 something more...

All I Could Think About

Today I was in our lecture hall for 5 hours.

It was also freezing. (I do not know who decides what temperature buildings should be, but whoever it is, they are doing a really bad job of it.) Being cold also makes you hungrier (thanks M1 Physio!)

Our Immuno lecture quickly devolved into this:

Most interesting aside: I don't even like tomatoes.

Common Sense

Bllllech! (enGROSSed* by Dermatology)

Traditionally, Chicago Medical School tries to practice systems-based teaching. It's redundant, but after you learn what the heart looks like (physically), what it does (physiologically), and what hormones can do to it (chemically), you (hopefully) now a lot about the heart simply by going to class and being semi-attentive.

Systems-Based teaching has fallen apart after our first two exams: Pharmacology is covering autonomic nervous system; Microbiology is introducing itself; and finally, Pathology is teaching us about skin.

Now I could go on another rant about Dermatology. I think it's worthless. I've seen a dermatologist once, and it was interesting but also pretty useless. I also feel like most of the serious derm conditions (i.e., skin cancer...) are mostly white people problems. I know I should care, but it's just that unless it's a condition I have or a condition that one of my friends or relatives has, I don't care nearly as much as a "doctor" probably should (I don't know why I threw quotes around the word doctor. Suspicious...)

So my feeling towards Dermatology are pretty negative (also, somehow, racist). People keep telling me that sometimes dermatology is really important and not superficial. And while I respect this point, it doesn't seem like enough for me.

This has recently changed. I was told that 1) Dermatology has the most medical conditions/illnesses of any specialty and 2) Dermatology offers insight into internal medicine illnesses.

skin disorders can be manifestations of systemic disease.


*Title is totally derived from the great Alice Lee, a fellow compatriot of CMS