I realized earlier this week that I was getting very upset at my patients. And I didn't know why. OBGYN is only women, and almost all of them were very nice (or however nice anyone who's contracting can be.)
It was only when I saw a newly created father staring at his neonate that I realized why I was so upset. I was jealous. You keep telling yourself you want to be a doctor. I think it's something that I really want to do. But most people my age are.... And there are a lot of things I do on my downtime that aren't medical school related. But being a mom isn't one of them. And it isn't in my foreseeable future or even my actual future. Being pregnant sounds miserable. Being in a stable relationship with a significant other sounds worse. So this whole family thing is impossible.
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